“Does Your Ad Copy Lose Customers for You?” The Customer “Anti-Attraction” Litmus Test

It truly is a shame. I see literally hundreds of ads each month that speak volumes about the advertiser. And about 85% of those aren’t saying much. Remember, your ad is a representation of you and your product. Be sure to treat it as such.

Is your ad copy losing customers for you?

Are you sure ?

I’ll not bore you with a lecture. Instead, we’ll learn the fun way … by talking about other people! (Just kidding. We’ll learn by example. Well, okay. We’ll learn by example, and by laughing at other people. Hey — it’s fair.)

Now where was I?

Oh: Yes, please avoid these sales-assassinating ad copy "dunce moves" at all costs.

NOTE: Names have been changed to protect the moronic.

ImADunce Web Hosting proudly proclaims…

"The lowest prices on the Internet … * almost * guaranteed!"

Eh?

Either it’s guaranteed, or it… … … … … ? (trails off for dramatic effect)

I’d guess their prospects are "almost " confident about doing business with them. I mean … I "almost" would be.

Almost…

Ezine Publisher, Mr. Hold U. Hostij, is guilty of…

Having a prominent, clickable subscribe link scattered throughout the newsletter we’re … umm … already reading. But then forcing the poor souls who want to un subscribe to:

1. read a monologue,
2. dig a very unclickable e-mail address from black text in an obscure section of his plain text newsletter,
3. type or copy and paste said "buried treasure" into their e-mail client to "prepare" to leave the ezine…
4. …then manually "double opt-OUT" to "confirm" their request.

Hunh!?

I mean … really liked Easter egg hunts as a kid, but this is ridiculous.

Itza Ripoff Customer Service Outsourcing promises to…

Offer real-time chat support to your website visitors.

Okay, wait. That’s cool.

But…

If Itza Ripoff handles just 150-200 customer service inquiries for you in a month, it’ll cost you $3,500.00 .

Wow, what a steal! *cough*But that’s STILL not all.

Even if Itza Ripoff handles only "0-25" customer service inquiries for you in one month, it will cost you $600 .

Red alert! Warning! The plane is going down!

Do you see the problem here?

If they handle NO inquiries for you at all, you’ll still be donating $600 per month to Itza Ripoff’s charity. (Oops! I mean "service.")

By the way … how will they be able to verify the number of inquiries they’ve "handled"? And WOULD they veri-? Uh-oh. Never mind. We’d best not go there.

Bulk Mailer, I. Lyke Spam, asserts that his service is:

"So Simple, So Affective!"

*Ahem*

If it’s that "Affective" … couldn’t they at least spell it right? And could they themselves be "affective" enough to notice that they combined two sentences into one?

Tough questions.

I bet they’d claim that this same spam was also "So Opt-in!"

I guess.

WeSukk AtMarketing Promotional Services asks (tells!?):

"Do You Need A Helping Hand!"

Hmmm. With what……………….!?

And … are you asking me or telling me?

They then go on to say:

"Do You Need a Helping Hand in Promoting your Opporunities, Poducts or Services!"

Ah! Ummm…?

But what’s an "oppoRUNity"…? And a "poduct"…?

Eh. I think I’ll pass.

We Sigh…

Yessss, I know, I know. None of your advertising will be this bad.

Or this obvious.

Or this obviously bad .

But, these are real-life, real-world, scarily true-to-form examples of what could conceivably happen were you not careful to proofread your advertising , evaluate your sales message , and just plain take the time to get the darn thing RIGHT.

Craft a convincing, professional sales message and proofread it to perfection. And for goodness sake, don’t forget to ask yourself…

What is your ad copy saying about YOU?

Might be a good time to go check? ;)

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 Respected Business & Marketing author H.T. Major has nearly a decade of collective experience fine-tuning the art of creating effective, efficient business websites that SELL, and boosting the conversion of existing sites. Now she offers supremely affordable website, photo, & business design services that are not only about creating "pretty pictures", but about creating RESULTS: visit ChumpChangeWebDesign.com.

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